How to Create Happiness Part 2 By Chaz Malewski

Hello my friends! Hope you are having a super fantastic week! Please send good energy and vibes to my friend Chaz today, as he is participating in a Firewalking Instructor Training certification this week! I am super excited for him to take this step on his journey of self-discovery and empowerment! Please visit Chaz’s website and subscribe to his newsletter for updates on health, fitness, and other great stuff!

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Here is Part 2 of his series: How to Create Happiness, focusing on Environment!

Does your place of residence bring you happiness? How about your neighborhood or neighboring cities?

Are your friends supportive of your desires and contribute to your well-being?

If your environment is not conducive to your wishes, then you may have a very difficult time finding happiness.

Where you live can largely impact your emotions. If you follow the news, you will often hear of multiple crimes in cities such as Wilmington, DE or Philadelphia, PA. If you live in one of these cities or have relatives there, your emotions are exposed to the impact of these crimes.

If, however, you lived in Scottsdale, AZ (which has the lowest crime rate in America), you probably wouldn’t worry too much about getting shot on your way home from work.

Obviously these are exaggerated examples, but they prove that your environment can either negatively or positively impact your emotional state and happiness.

Look for the beauty in your surroundings. If you live in a rough neighborhood, this is the way I see it: you either move away or you seek out the benefits of living in such an area. Like we covered last week, your focus will play a role in your happiness, so focus on the good of your environment. Where there is bad there is always an opposite good.

The point is that if you are living in an area that depresses you, you will have a difficult time finding true happiness unless you work for it. Do not let your surrounding environment hold you back from the things you deserve.

Your social circle and family also count towards your environment.

Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

Take a minute to think about the five people you spend the most time with. Maybe they are friends? Maybe family? Whoever they are, I want you to think of their qualities and characteristics.

Are they often optimistic and smiling? Or do they normally come to you with complaints and negativity?

The longer you are exposed to an environment, or a person, the more you will begin to adopt the accompanying traits.

I lived with two of my best friends for two years. I love these guys to death and would do anything for them. But they normally did nothing but complain and procrastinate. After a while, I found myself acting the exact same way they were.

Who you spend time with will greatly influence your level of happiness.

Don’t cut out your friends and family completely; that’s ridiculous. Instead, become more aware of how the people in your life are affecting you. Spend less time with the ones that bring you down and more time with the ones that support you.

I guarantee taking note and making adjustments in your environment will dramatic transform your life for the better.

Join me again next week when I cover happiness tenet 3: Passion.

I would love to hear your thoughts on how your environment influences your happiness. Please comment below! Don’t forget to visit Chaz’s website; he has tons of great stuff coming up this year!!

Until next time, stay mindful and stay present,

Love, Melissa

How to Create Happiness Part 1 by Chaz Malewski

Hello everyone! I am super excited to share today’s post with you from my colleague and dear friend Chaz Malewski. Chaz is a personal trainer and life coach based in Delaware. He is available for online consultations and programming, and I can tell you first hand, he knows his stuff! Make sure you visit his website and sign up for his newsletter; he is pretty amazing!

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I am in the process of doing some re-branding my website, creating some new programs, and preparing for the release of my first book: In10tions: A Mindset Reset Guide to Happiness, so things are crazy busy! Chaz has offered to help me out by guest blogging and is providing a four part series on How to Create Happiness. I am super excited, because it is good stuff! So without further ado, here is tenet one of How to Create Happiness, focusing on mindset!

Imagine if you could be happy all the time, no matter what the circumstance.

While it sounds like a fantasy, it is very much attainable. In fact, I’ll prove it. If you aren’t happy right now, you are about to be. If you are happy, you’re going to be even happier.

I want you to think of your happiest memory. If you have many, just choose whichever one you would like.

In a moment, I want you to close your eyes and throw yourself fully into this memory. When you do this, use all of your senses to recreate the moment. See everything the way it was. Remember the feeling you had during this time; the smell in the air, the emotions surrounding the event. Feel your environment and look into the eyes of whoever may have been with you during this time. And, most importantly, smile the entire time.

Now, close your eyes and do not return to reading this until you have totally re-experienced your happiest moment. Stay in the moment as long as you would like.

How do you feel now? Are you happier than you were before?

If you answered yes, then you just created your very own happiness in mere moments!

See, the memory you had isn’t completely real. Our mind cannot remember every single detail of everything that’s ever happened to us, so it must create aspects of our past to complete the memory. You’ve probably experienced this when someone told you a story from your past, yet you remembered it differently.

But here’s the best part: you just figured out a way to forge happiness and all you needed was your brain.

Pretty sweet, eh?

We tend to get into a rut at one time or another and think that we need something to bring us happiness. Whether it is a new job, a new car, jewelry, food, etc., we have a tendency to “buy happiness”. And while the old saying “you can’t buy happiness” means well, it’s not exactly true; you can buy many things that will make you happy. The problem surfaces when we depend on material objects and outside sources to make ourselves happy, rather than relying on our ability to create our happiness.

The mind can make or break a soul. If you can align your mindset with what you

truly want out of life, you will always live to your full potential and happiness is sure to follow.

Take some time to recount old memories or times that you felt ecstatic; when you were carefree. Learn a little more about yourself and explore the things that have always made you happy. Compile a list of your favorite activities and experiences. Begin to train your mind to focus on the best parts of your life and what you enjoy most.

When you begin to reframe your thinking and channel your focus to the positives in your life, negativity loses its impact.

The key to being truly happy is understanding that you are in control of it.

Start to take a few minutes out of each day (10-15 to start) and channel some happy memories. Try to use some of that time to do something that you love, which breaks your normal routine. Begin to create the happiness in your life that you desire, because it’s totally up to you how you feel.

If you want to be negative, think negatively. If you want to be positive, think positively. It really is that simple. Now, whether you choose to believe that or not will be indicative of your willingness to be happy.

Stay tuned for next week’s installment when I go over happiness tenet number 2: environment.

Make sure you visit Chaz’s website: www.chazmalewski.com and subscribe to his newsletter!

Until next time, Stay mindful, Stay present!
Love, Melissa

Strength in Vulnerability

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Help, I need somebody
Help, not just anybody
Help, you know I need someone, help

When I was younger (So much younger than) so much younger than today
(I never needed) I never needed anybody’s help in any way
(Now) But now these days are gone (These days are gone), I’m not so self assured
(I know I’ve found) Now I find I’ve changed my mind and opened up the doors

I love the Beatles. And I love this song. And I thought it was quite fitting for what I have been going through lately. Through a series of events that I am not quite ready to disclose right now (with time dear reader) I have had to ask for a lot of help lately. Help from family, friends, and co-workers. Now I have never been too proud to ask for help in the past, but this time around it is more challenging, because the need for help has been quite constant. And even though “I ain’t too proud to beg.”, it can be quite humbling to put yourself out there asking for help over and over and over again.

Asking for help puts you in a vulnerable situation. And we all know most of us react in those vulnerable situations…we don’t like it. We feel exposed, naked, and completely open to whatever battle we are facing without a shield. We feel scared, uncertain, anxious, and second guess ourselves. Vulnerability is not a picnic.

Yet vulnerability is vital. Vital for our growth and progression as we become more and more in tune to who we are. True vulnerability is to let it go: (yet another song, I am on a roll today!) all the B.S. that is holding you back and open yourself up to being hurt and rejected, knowing that what is one the other side is so much greater than where you are. And sometimes to be vulnerable, you do have to ask for help. Sometimes alot of help. And that can be embarrassing and shameful in many ways, knowing that you can’t do it all. But what a blessing it can be instead…to be vulnerable and truthful with yourself that you need support and that you trust someone enough to nurture you through this tough time. Most people are willing to help, because that love is who they really are inside, and to deny them that opportunity because you are afraid to be vulnerable and ask…well that’s a little selfish wouldn’t you say?

Here’s the thing:

As much as you want to believe you can, you can’t always do it all.
Sometimes you need help.
Sometimes alot of help.
Vulnerability doesn’t make you any less of a person.
Ask for help.
It’s ok.
Because who you really are is beautiful.
You are loved.
You are enough.

How will you become more vulnerable each and every day? I would love to hear your comments, please share below!

Have a beautiful week and I am sending so much love to everyone! Until next time, stay mindful, stay present.

Love, Melissa